Today I read a post on BlackNews.com about a father gaining custody of his baby after his wife secretly gave her away. I was shocked to learn that a wife would do such a thing to her husband. According to the story he moved out of state while his wife was pregnant to take on a new job. Days later his wife signed papers with an adoption agency giving the baby up. She was placed with a family in Utah that now claims he isn't capable of taking care of the child because he abandoned his wife and unborn baby. The judge ruled in favor of the father because he had no knowledge of his wife's actions and when he learned of what happened the agency did not provide him with information when he attempted to obtain it nearly two years ago. I don't want to judge any party in this case because I have not walked in their shoes and do not know the inside story. Yet, I cannot help but have pity for the father and the couple. The couple have made this bond with this child that they thought would be their own and developed their families around it. However, the father was denied his parental rights in the case. The couple blames the father, yet they only had the mother's story to go on and whatever she told them or the adoption agency. I don't know if she did this out of fear, retaliation against him for some perceived wrong, or if she wasn't ready to be a mother and they disagreed on that point. But whatever the case, he deserved to have his rights respected as well.
All too often as a society we disregard the rights of fathers and women tend to have strong feelings about their rights. I think in many instances men are not genuinely heard in terms of their feelings, their roles in the lives of their children, and in terms of their marriages. There are so many excellent fathers in the world and those that are not standing up to their responsibilities make it difficult for those who are. I know too many men that have been challenged on their parental rights because the female felt as if the man didn't have any rights because the baby came from her body. Yes, we do carry that child for 9 months, go through extreme physical, emotional and psychological changes to carry the baby to term. Not to mention the issues we go through after birthing the baby, such as postpartum, major life changes, and getting rid of the excess weight. However, when allowed many fathers have their changes to go through also. Many fathers are fighting for the right to be a part of these children's lives and women can be very vindictive and manipulative when they cannot have things their way. I have seen women who have denied father's their rights because the man did not want to be with the woman. There are also instances where the man was denied the rights because the woman didn't want the child. Whether or not she chooses to keep the child after giving birth is up to her; however, if she decides not to do so the father should be the next person in line for consideration. Read the article link below and please leave a comment I would love to learn how you feel on this hot topic also.
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C. MICHELLE RAMSEY
C. MICHELLE RAMSEY